The Inner Wealth Podcast

Ep192. Beyond the Surface - Unlocking the Power of Deep Connection.

Mike Kitko

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In this episode, Mike pulls back the curtain on his journey since 2016—a path of self-discovery that flipped his world upside down. He lays bare a truth that hit him hard: superficial conversation leaves him empty. With raw honesty, he breaks down three levels of conversational intimacy—surface chatter, mental exploration, and the soul-deep emotional core. Drawing from personal resistance and breakthroughs, Mike reveals how craving depth became his guiding light. He connects with his tribe—people seeking transformation through truth and transcendence through love—and invites you to ditch the small talk for something real. Tune in to explore what lights you up and join Mike’s Inner Wealth Mastermind retreat in the Outer Banks, starting next week, where depth isn’t just a buzzword—it’s the mission.

Key Takeaways

1. Depth Trumps Surface Every Time
Superficial talk drains you—real connection fills your soul with purpose.

2. Three Levels Shape Every Exchange
From weather to ideas to emotions, only the deepest level unlocks true intimacy.

3. Resistance Points to Your Power
That restlessness in shallow moments is your soul begging for more.

4. Your Tribe Lives in the Deep End
Scorpio demands truth, Pisces craves love—both reject the shallow end of the pool.

5. Alignment Fuels Transformation
When you lean into what inspires you, relationships become a launchpad for growth.

Notable Quotes

“I had zero appetite and I had zero patience for… superficial conversation.”
 “I wanna know what fears you have. I wanna know where you feel fear.”
 “The thing that most people think is… what’s wrong with you is truly your gift.”
 “They don’t want me to just let them speak a bunch of nonsense and… not address it.”
 “If you’re listening to this… you probably do get bored in level one conversational intimacy.”


Music Credit: "What's Left of Me" by Wes Hoffman & Friends

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Mike Kitko is an executive self-mastery coach, speaker and author. He found external success through powerful titles, incomes, and material possessions. He ultimately fell into depression, toxic abuse of alcohol, and the near collapse of his family before he began a journey of internal happiness and success.

Speaker 1:

Do you ever wake up feeling like there's something missing in your life? Do you ever feel the need to escape your business? Are you running your life or is your life running you? I'm Mike Kitko and I'll help you design and create a life so authentic and aligned with who you really are you'll get excited just to wake up. I'll help you create real wealth, success and freedom from the inside out. Welcome to the Inner Wealth Podcast, where we learn and choose to live inspired each and every day On this self-development, self-awareness, personal improvement path that I've been on since March of 2016,.

Speaker 1:

A lot of things about me and how I understand myself and how I understand life. They've shifted radically and I remember, early on in my journey early on you know we're talking 2016, 2017, I started to realize that I had zero appetite and I had zero patience for let's call it in my mind, these are my words, so you know my wife. This doesn't ring true to my wife when, when I, when I'm talking about how I see this thing, but it is true for me when I say I don't have a whole lot of appetite or a whole lot of patience for superficial conversation. I, when I think about conversation and I've I've done episodes on this before there before. There's like three levels of conversational intimacy that I have experienced, that I've identified. The first level of conversational intimacy is very superficial and it's about the weather and sports and politics and economics, and sports and politics and economics. And it's not that they're not important, it's not that these elements aren't important and it's not like they're not interesting, but there's really not a whole lot there. There's not a whole lot for us to personally like to do something with. And I like to do something with conversation. I like for there to be a purpose and a meaning and some kind of a transformational ability that we derive, capability or capacity that we derive from conversations or discussions or relationships.

Speaker 1:

I realized a long time ago that I don't have a lot of really, really close friends. I have a very small group of people that I meet with, that I kind of hang out with, I guess, befriend. I do have my, my, my inner wealth mastermind and and the they are not my mastermind is not at, you know, level one conversational intimacy, but but that it's our, it's our mastermind and we, although there are pockets like we have our spring retreat next week there's going to be pockets of communication. There's going to be pockets of friendship, of fellowship at. You know, we're going to the Outer Banks, north Carolina. There's going to be pockets of that.

Speaker 1:

But the work that we're there to do is not level one conversational intimacy. There's a depth to it, there's meaning, but when it comes to just people who I'm really tight with in life, that I would say that I do life with on a regular basis, I don't have many, but what I have are a few that go really, really deep and level one conversational intimacy is all about like surface level conversation. There's not a lot of depth to it. And when Angie loves learning people's favorite color and their favorite sports teams and their favorite bands, she loves those things and those elements of life don't really light me up, they don't. There's nothing for me to sink my teeth into with that, into with that. I often say and it sounds kind of asshole-ish that I really don't. I'm not interested in learning the names of your husband and your wife and your kids and all these things. To me, that's level one conversational intimacy. I want to get to level two and three.

Speaker 1:

Level two is more about the mental plane. It's about your vision, your goals, your strategies, that you're using tactics, that you're using processes. It's more about the mental realm. It's more about what's happening in your mind and what are your plans and what are your ideas. Level two is a level below level one conversational intimacy. It's less superficial and it's more getting to, really getting inside of the person. But it's only one level deep and they're still in those situations. Deep and they're still in those situations. They're still. For me, it lacks a little bit of depth for it to be truly, truly interesting. I think there's there's some value in level two conversational intimacy, which is really about the mental world, which is really about you know what's happening in your mind. There's there's, you know. There's certainly some value, there's certainly some benefit, there's certainly a connectedness in level two conversational intimacy, but it's not the depth that I'm looking for.

Speaker 1:

Level three conversational intimacy is all about the emotional world. It's all about where spirit lives in you, inspired in spirit. It's all about where spirit lives in you, inspired in spirit. It's the flow of energy through you. Emotion is energy in motion. Level three conversational intimacy is really about tell me what you're feeling in there, tell me what's going on in your body. I want to know what fears you have. I want to know where you feel fear. I want to know where you feel joy. I want to know what lights you up. I want to know what inspires you. I want to know what uninspires you. I want to know when you feel bored. I want to know when you feel encouraged. I want to know when you feel encouraged. I want to know when you feel something that lights up your body and gets you into rhythm and gets you into action or is a big stop sign.

Speaker 1:

And the reason I say all of this is because back in 2016 and 2017, when I was paying attention to my body, whenever there'd be level one conversational intimacy, I could feel resistance in my body, that I was out of alignment and I wasn't where I wanted to be and I wasn't tasting the depth of life that I wanted to taste and I wasn't feeling the depth of life that I wanted to feel. And it's not boredom, I wanted to taste and I wasn't feeling the depth of life that I wanted to feel. And and there's, there's it's not boredom, I wouldn't say, but it's just when you're for me, when you're in conversational or level one conversational intimacy, where it's, it's all just about the superficial, surface level stuff of life. There's this void of inspiration in me that loves to get deeper and get inside of somebody to really understand what's happening in their mind and body. So when I look at my clientele, when I look at the people in the Interwealth Mastermind, when I look when we're not in session, where there will be socialization, there will be connection. It's almost like our retreats, our Interwealth Mastermind retreats. They're almost like they're family reunions in a way shape or form, where it's people that haven't seen each other for six months except on a Zoom call get together and now we want to spend some time and want to be together and want to experience life together. But in the work that we do there is a depth that goes beyond anything superficial or surface level.

Speaker 1:

I worked with a market, worked with a marketer and I've actually done a podcast episode with her and her name's Ashley May Fernandez and she she's a genius marketer and I did some work with her and she helped me identify like the ideal client in my life. And there's two. They're two distinct types of people but they share the same commonality. They share the same, the same desires of what they're actually after and what they actually want in their life. But they're two. They show up differently my, my ideal one-on-one client, my, my ideal one-on-one client. And and I'm gonna this is where it's good it's gonna get a lot woo because she's an astrological marketer she does, you know, she uses human design and astrology and gene keys and all the stuff that I love to do some marketing. She's the first marketer that didn't ask me who my ideal client was, but told, told me and she was spot the fuck on. But she said for my ideal one-on-one client, it's Scorpio energy and it's power through truth, it's transformation through truth, it's deep, it's meaningful.

Speaker 1:

Scorpio energy doesn't want to be told what they want to hear. They want to be told what they need to hear so that they can transform, so they can be reborn, so that they can level up, so that they can step into another level of power, so they can step into another level of their potential, so that they can step into another level of their purpose. Scorpio energy is very driven, very determined, and inside of them, in their bodies, there's an emotional wave that they're always trying to understand, that they're always trying to manage, that they're always trying to master, that they're always trying to become in tune with Seemingly with pure Scorpio energy, the workings of the world and how to work in the world and how to create wealth and success in the world and how to create an awesome life outside. It seems easier for Scorpios than most, than most Scorpio energy, than most signs, and they have a tendency to level up fast. They're driven and determined and and they work and when they work it works and they create extraordinary external lives. But their work is really understanding what's happening in their body and mastering their emotions.

Speaker 1:

And when I'm in collaboration with my Scorpio energy clients and I'm not saying Scorpio, that's Scorpio sign is the Scorpio energy, when I'm in alignment and I'm collaborating with them. They do not want me to just let them speak a bunch of nonsense and just let it go and not address it. They're looking for me to listen to their words. They're looking for me to listen for their limiting beliefs. They're looking for me to listen to their limitations, that they're speaking and they want me to poke them in the eye and point them out, because what they want more than anything Is transformation. They don't want it. They're okay if it's messy, they're okay if it doesn't feel good. They know that the key to transformation, the key to their rebirth. The key to their leveling up Is going to be getting uncomfortable and they want to be told what they need to hear, not what they want to be told. What they need to hear, not what they want to hear Transformation through truth. And they're driven and determined to transform their lives and to level up in every aspect of their lives.

Speaker 1:

The Scorpio Energy one-on-one clients that I have are wealthy and successful and they're fit and they have awesome marriages and they're always looking to level up. And I like to say where most people are trying to go from 50% or 60% to 80%, my Scorpio clients are trying to go from 99 to 99.1% and they know that the key to going from 99% to 99.1% is in one belief, it's in one perception, it's in one perspective and a little tiny shift that's going to unlock a new dilemma or new paradigm in their life. It's going to reshape a dilemma. It's going to create a new paradigm in their life. In my mastermind it's a completely different vibe. My mastermind students, they're Pisces energy.

Speaker 1:

My ideal mastermind students, it's Pisces energy. It's all about spirituality. It's all about spiritual principles. It's all about energy healing. It's all about the mystical. It's all about transcendence through love. It's all about the power of the community. It's all about the love and the connection and the relationships and the depth and the level two and level three conversational intimacy. It's all about the connection. It's all about acceptance and love and authenticity and just leveling each other up and being empowered by other people that are going in the same direction In the mastermind. This is why we have a book study where we study self-mastery concepts and we have a soul sciences call where we study astrology and human design and gene keys and the life you were born to live and soul contracts.

Speaker 1:

It's because the Pisces energy clients that I have, the mastermind students that I have. They want to know everything about all of the mystical and the more esoteric parts of this human experience. So they're willing to study some things that most people won't. They're willing to read some things that most people won't. They're willing to let go of beliefs and perspectives that most people won't. They want the depth of spirituality, they want the mystical. They want to understand life at a different level. It's not just about leveling up in their life. They want to understand life at a different level. It's not just about leveling up in their life. They want to understand life. They want to comprehend what this is all about. And whether it be Scorpio energy or whether it be Pisces energy, in the one-on-one or in the mastermind, these are really deep people and they don't play on the surface. They are deep, multi-dimensional people that are curious about life, that are curious about themselves, that want to understand everything that they need to level up in the dimension that they want to level up in. And Scorpio it's more about the internal transformation to create more external success and wealth. And the Pisces energy it's all about transcendence through love and spirituality. But neither of them play at the surface level.

Speaker 1:

When I go to network the thing and I don't go to network a lot, and partly the reason is because I'm always more curious about what's really really deep and meaningful in somebody's lives and typically at a typical networking event you really don't have time to get that deep. But when I do network I'm looking for one person to let me in, for one person to let me in, and I'm looking for one person to really unlock the door so that we can get into level two and level three conversational intimacy. At at the choose your destiny live intensive workshop, it's pretty typical for me to get inside of somebody's awareness and start to unlock pain and suffering and grief. And I'm not a therapist. But when I help them understand what they're really thinking and what they're really feeling and how they're really showing up, I invite them to let it go and surrender the pain and surrender the suffering. And that is conversational, like third dimensional, third level conversational intimacy. I do not play at the surface level and this is why I don't have a whole lot of just shallow relationships where it's just about getting to know you. No, I don't want to get to know you, I want to get to know what's inside of you, what's happening inside.

Speaker 1:

I am psychologically and philosophically curious. The impact for me in this world has been by realizing the impact that I make and the impact that I've had on people. And the impact in my life is realizing how I don't typically just fit into the material world and the messages that I send and the information and the wisdom that I share. It doesn't connect with the typical human being in this experience who wakes up and goes to work at nine o'clock, comes home at five, has a wife, has a kid or a couple of kids, or has a spouse, has a house and is just looking to retire and has some Netflix shows that they're always watching. It's just that stereotypical human life Typically, those people don't show up in my life.

Speaker 1:

The people who show up in my life are the spiritual warriors who really, really want to dive deep, who want to get into uncharted territories in authenticity, in vulnerability, in rawness and really creating a safe space for each other to be absolutely true to ourselves, without being judged, without being criticized or without being corrected in some way, shape or form, or without being corrected in some way, shape or form. The people in my life want to go deep and I want to go deep with them. Now, why am I saying all this? Because years ago, I thought I was a little bit of an asshole and I was at times accused of being a little bit of an asshole. And I was at times accused of being a little bit of an asshole because I was bored in certain transactional interpersonal connection and I thought it was something that I needed to fix in me in order to not be so, not need to go deep all the time that there was something wrong with me.

Speaker 1:

But you know what? The thing that most people think is your. What's wrong with you is truly your gift and truly your superpower. Because if you're listening to this, if you're watching this, you're not built like everybody else. We are not like them. You listen to this because you want depth, you want meaning, you want the philosophy, you want the esoteric, you want truth. You are a seeker of truth and you want to unlock a whole new level of mastery inside of you Because you know that's where freedom lives. If you're listening to this, that is what's in you, that's trying to get out, and if you're listening to this, you probably do get bored in level one conversational intimacy, interactions and transactions, because you're not built like everybody else.

Speaker 1:

When I was working with Ashley and we were talking about my ideal client, she said Mike, you're a weirdo and you're here to teach weirdos. You're a misfit and you're here to teach misfits. You're here to be on the cutting edge of philosophy and spirituality and mysticism and you're here to speak that shit into the world. And then those people, those few people who are after that, will lean in. But you're not for everybody and I knew that at the core. But the really truly lean into that has been absolutely liberating and absolutely freeing and totally fulfilling in this lifetime.

Speaker 1:

I want you to reflect on what types of relationships light you up, what level of conversational intimacy do you live in and what level of conversational intimacy do you allow yourself to fall into? Because, for me, I don't want to play at the surface, I don't want to play on the surface and I don't want to play in the superficial world. I want to get to know your problem, your obstacle, your internal challenge, so that we can unlock that shit, so you can naturally and authentically step into a whole nother level of wealth and success in the external world. But until we get in there and I understand what's in there, I can't help at the depth that I can help at the capacity and the capability that I can help. But once I'm in there, we'll unlock all kinds of magical shit. I promise Guys, if any of this sounds like you whether it be the one-on-one client and that Scorpio energy that's driven and determined, that really wants the truth and transformation through truth, or if you're that Pisces energy and you want the spirituality and you want the mysticism and you want the depth of community and you want to be around people that are doing the same work and and feel, want to feel, at a deeper level.

Speaker 1:

If either of these sounds like you, I'd love you to shoot me a message, and you can. You can email me at Mike at interwealthglobalcom and getting connection. You can go to interwealthglobalcom and send me a message through the website. But if either of these sounds like you, I would love, love, love to have a conversation with you to see if we're a good fit. I am looking for one new private client. I haven't taken on a new private client in a long time. That's a one-on-one relationship. I have a client I haven't taken on a new private client in a long time. That's a one-on-one relationship. That's that person that's already wealthy and already is successful that is looking to unlock a whole other level of themselves, and if that's you, I would love to have that conversation. If you're craving a spiritual community that will allow you to be a weirdo, because we invite all the spiritual misfits into the world, into our community, if that sounds like you, lean in. We'd love to have some new family members. Guys, I love you.

Speaker 1:

Next week we'll be in the Outer Banks, north Carolina, and Angie and I are going.

Speaker 1:

When we get to the Outer Banks early in the week we're going to do a podcast episode.

Speaker 1:

So next week is going to be all about our journey and our travel to our Inner Wealth Mastermind Retreat in the Outer Banks, our spring retreat. We do this twice a year. We go to an awesome place in the spring and we also go to an awesome place in the fall place in the spring and we also do go to an awesome place in the fall. We went to Gatlinburg in last October. We've been to Miami and Denver and San Antonio and Sedona and, like I said, miami, gatlinburg and now Outer Banks. We're going to hit up some really cool places and if that sounds like something you'd be interested in spending a couple of days every couple of months, spending a couple of days with a spiritual community that is nothing but love and inspiration We'd love to have you part. But message me, Mike at innerwealthglobalcom and we'll get in touch. But until next week, if you enjoyed what you heard and you want to learn more, go to wwwinnerwealthglobalcom for more tools and resources.